remembering Melissa

I got a call from J this morning. He called to tell me that his mother had called him and told him that Melissa, a friend of ours from high school, had died. Apparently from cancer.

Melissa, J, A and I used to hang out in high school our senior year and bit in the first semester of college together. I had moved away to here in Barstow while J and A had distanced themselves from her. It wasn't for malicious reasons. Their lives just moved in different directions. The last time I had seen Melissa was on a visit to Merced in the mid-90's when J and I went to Longs Drugs to pick up something. She was working as a cashier there and we just spoke a few words to each other. Even then I had felt sort of bad not taking the time to catch up with her.

About a year ago or so she had emailed me via highschoolalumni.com to catch up on things. I told myself I would respond but never did. That's not out of character for me. I'm terrible about replying to any and all emails. But now knowing she's gone... well, the guilt is starting to set in.

I don't know. I am feeling sad that she's gone but I'm wondering if I'm not feeling sad enough.
  • Current Music: Tori Amos - "A Sorta Fairytale"