2013

time for another "if I were dictator"

I'd give everyone a free name change once they turn 18 years old. No reason needed, just call a 1-800 number then BAM! They'd need to keep it for at least a year after which they could change it back. Sometimes we need to try on a new identity.

Note: On a previous IIWD about two years ago, I made it a crime to play a car stereo loud enough to be heard 50 feet away from the car. I'm upping the sentence for a first offense to 15 years in jail. This was brought on by the gentleman who's been parking his red car in the alley behind my apartment who seems to thinks everyone in a 2 block radius likes his crappy bass-laden rap music.
  • Current Music: Nightmare Of You - "I Want To Be Buried In Your Backyard"
I'm sorry, but in this country at least, fear of lawsuits would require you to use the term "... brought on by the alleged gentleman" in this instance.