IF THE THREE WISE MEN HAD BEEN WOMEN:
- They would have asked directions.
- Arrived on time.
- Helped deliver the baby.
- Cleaned the stable.
- Made a casserole.
- Brought practical gifts
- There would be Peace On Earth.
IF THE THREE WISE MEN HAD BEEN GAY:
- They would have done a fabulous parade through the "Big B" in floor-length auburn/gold sequined capes to match the "Star of Bethlehem" lighting effects.
- Arrived early.
- Helped deliver the baby and dressed it in a gorgeous buttercream-colored 100% Egyptian Cotton throw.
- Cleaned the stable and redecorated it in a western theme to match the animals.
- Would NOT have made a casserole -- instead, a flawless entree of Chilean sea bass dusted in cocoa powder, with Guatemalan mangoes in a light chutney mix, mashed potatoes with a light cream fennel sauce, Anjou pears with Grand Marnier meringue swirls, topped off with perfectly ripened Brie and caff/half-caff Cappuccino con panna.
- The practical gifts would have included several items from the new Martha Stewart Living Collection.
- Peace On Earth?? How can you have any peace when the entire night screams for a drag number?